The Zong

ESPN has finally proven that there is someone thinking up top. After stupefying the masses with incredible decisions such as deciding to carry the WNBA and the “Bonds on Bonds” fiasco, they’ve finally done something that made me openly applaud: they bitch-slapped Joe Theismann right on out of the Monday Night Football booth.

Anyone who has had to endure listening to Theismann during an otherwise interesting football game might also rejoice at the fact that he has merely been removed from MNF, but ESPN has really knocked him down a few pegs.

Williamson said ESPN hoped to retain Theismann by offering him another prominent football commentating job. Williamson would not specify what job, but Theismann later said by phone it was the Saturday night college football package with Brent Musburger. Kirk Herbstreit and Bob Davie worked with Musburger last season.

Brent Musburger, huh? Now that’s a broadcast team that just screams “youth” at the top of its lungs. Maybe they can get Pat Summerall to come on in and, uh, Summerall up. (Sorry)

So the quarterback controversy at ESPN comes to an end, as young upstart Ron Jaworski comes in to play swords with Tony Kornheiser. I can’t think of a better shark/man for the job. Jaws is more knowledgeable than and just as loud as Theismann, and he has a nicer demeanor. Plus, he probably won’t glare at Kornheiser when he’s talking about the latest episode of “Lost” during the fourth quarter.

Although Jaworski is probably better known as an ESPN studio analyst, it may be more noteworthy that he has been friends with Kornheiser for a long time and has appeared on “Pardon the Interruption” frequently. The two men clearly get along well.

Don’t you just love happy endings?

- M.G.