The Zong

I try not to think about Ann Coulter too much, much less write about her on these pages, but my boy Marco left me a voicemail imploring me to write something about the shit she said at CPAC 2007, and so I must. I’ll give you a call sometime tonight, brah.

The thing is, the more people write and gasp about the feces that Skullface Coulter craps out of her word-hole, the smellier and more relevant said feces becomes. That said, my general opinion of her reads something like this: She’s hard to look at, and the only reason she offends me is because she isn’t funny. Much like the rest of this country’s political pundits (on both sides), her jokes are tired, badly delivered, and nothing she says really interests me at all. She’s basically like Jay Leno without the tits. This isn’t the first time she’s called someone a faggot, and it definitely won’t be the last.

It should be noted that, at the time I’m writing this, the CPAC website has a header with a picture of Skully herself, along with a picture of Tom DeLay. Most of the Republican presidential candidates spoke there this weekend and later tried to disassociate themselves from Coulter, and as the New York Times says:

The criticisms by the Republican candidates put them in a difficult position because the Conservative Political Action Conference has been gathering for conservative and Republican leaders for over 25 years.

It’s certainly not a surprise to see that the GOP base is so supportive of homophobes and corruption at the highest levels of government, especially when you look at what happened with them at the helm for six years, so this is a pretty stupid news item in general. I imagine they’re not too concerned with losing the gay vote, anyhow.

Actually, in the long run, I think that this meaningless utterance will have a positive affect on gay rights in this country. As with the Hardaway incident a few weeks back, these plain-speaking morons are making it real obvious in national public forums how similar the Gay Rights movement today is to the Civil Rights movement back in the day, and one can only imagine what the public reaction would be if Ann Coulter had instead called Barack Obama a “nigger.” I’ll bet a bunch of people at CPAC would still have applauded.

The thing is, the more airtime that is granted to people like Skullface, the more Americans will see that the liberals really aren’t making it up: Republicans are assholes. I wasn’t born an optimist, but I’d like to think most people in this country are decent folks who don’t want the country to be run by crotchety old white shitheads. At least, not any more.

- M.G.