The Zong

In case you missed it over last weekend. This really is a news headline:

International concern over China’s satellite-killing growing

This headline deserves to be in the Eye-Catching Headline Hall of Fame, when they get around to building it in Ohio somewhere. Evidently, the “concern” about this kind of a thing is pretty serious.

China used a ground-based medium-range ballistic missile to destroy an aging weather satellite, the Feng Yun 1C polar orbit weather satellite, about 537 miles above Earth on 11 January. The U.S. National Security Council, which monitored the act, described the procedure used as “kinetic impact.”

Part of me wanted to say “Awesome!” when I first saw this. I mean, I’ve been saying for years that there are too many goddamn satellites all over the place, and we need to start killing them, big time. But then I read this:

The U.S. had carried out similar tests in the cold war era, but had abandoned it since 1985, mainly concerned with the accumulation of debris in the space and potential threat to other civilian and military satellites in orbit.

Then I thought that we’ve already screwed up the environment right here in our own atmosphere, and maybe we should try not to screw up space, too.

You know all those bumper stickers you see out here in NorCal and thereabouts that say “Keep Tahoe Blue?” I want someone (like maybe Tim Lillis over at Narwhal Creative) to design me a bumper sticker that says “Keep Space Black.” Then I’m gonna print a brazillion of them and use an old bomber to drop them over Red China. That’ll show those space-polluting commies!

- M.G.